{Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction and does not present itself as the truth. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.}
LAHORE – Criticising the Pakistani business community in general over its lack of innovation and hard work, President of Aurora Bank Ltd Saleem Hassan has said that the time of lazy business is over.
“Pakistani banks need to roll up their sleeves and get their hands dirty,” he said, speaking to reporters at a small interaction with local journalists.
“The era of lazy business is over,” said the lazy banker, more than 80 percent of whose bank’s loans are in govt debt.
“Our local businesses should not expect customers and clients to simply just show up and give them their business automatically and collect their profits,” said the banking veteran, whose Aurora Bank is simply contacted by the federal finance ministry in Islamabad as well as the Punjab and Sindh finance departments for loans, against whom the governments will give a decent return.
“Businesses should not rely on the government to support their entire business model,” said Hassan, in a question about tax rebates for the textile industry.
“Pakistani businesses also need to take risks,” said the executor of the no-risk business model, “Only such calculated bets will pay off in the long run.”
“Of course we will charge high interest rates on business loans,” said the Aurora Bank chief, around three-fourths of whose private depositors have current, not savings accounts. “How else will we make this business work?”
“At the end of the day, there is no substitute for hard work.”
Members of the business community, when contacted, responded positively to the views.
“I will try to ensure my textile weaving unit works harder than a high-yield stable government bond,” said Sabir Haq, a textile business owner from Kasur.
